Poker Articles

Who Comes Through Ten Times Out of Ten?
By David Hench
(All Rights Reserved)

If you guessed Shaft, you're close. If you guessed "Cinch", you're right on the money. I'll just give you a few examples from his ordinary, everyday life. Isaac Hayes couldn't have sung it any better:

Who's the cat that won't crap out, when there's checkers all about? Cinch. Can you dig it?

Who's the cat that misdealt seventh-street, put the cards back in the stub, and with a few tricky shuffles, dealt everybody the same seventh street card? Cinch. Darn right.

Who's the cat that will loan a dollar to his fellow man? Cinch. Right on.

Who's the cat that check-raised himself all-in with no win against Seymour Liebowitz, and then had to borrow money to get to the airport? Cinch. Darn right.

Who's the cat that called the Baltimore Orioles' 21-game losing streak point blank on opening day, 1988? Cinch. That ain't no jive.

Who's the cat that called the 1989 NCAA Final between Michigan and Seton Hall to go into overtime? Cinch. Right on.

Who's the cat that made a 13 on a par three with no balls out of bounds. Cinch. You the man!

Who's the cat that made four-of-a-kind on three consecutive deals of the cards in Omaha on March 3, 1987? Cinch. I'm talking about Cinch.

Who's the cat that wheels and deals a blue streak when he goes busted? Cinch. Hush your face.

Who's the cat that would check-raise his grandmother? Cinch. Right on.

Who's the cat that made a pat 20 in blackjack on every deal for 12 hours on his first day ever in Nevada (at Harrah's Reno)? Cinch. You a bad mutha.

Who's the cat that dealt ten consecutive straight flushes to a sucker (in a 50 cent-$1.00 game) that was so drunk he was delirious and never even realized it was a joke? Cinch. That's who.

Who's the cat that filled a big water bottle with $5000.00 worth of quarters from a 50 cent-$1.00 game? Cinch. Darn right.

Who's the cat that won all 14 NFL games each of the first two weeks of the 1995 season? Cinch. Darn right.

Who's the dog that was busted a month later? Cinch. That's what I'm talking about.

Who's the cat that swears he knows what card is coming next when he is running bad? Cinch. Can you dig it?

Who's the cat whose role model is the 53rd card - the Joker? Cinch. Right on.

Who's the complicated cat that didn't know you could ask the bellhop if you were looking for a little companionship? Cinch. Shut your mouth.

Who's the cat that walked from the Mirage to the Tropicana looking for the Stardust? Cinch. I'm talking about Cinch.

Who's the cat with the magic touch at the Aladdin? Cinch. Darn right.

Who's the cat that busted Pierre and Clone on his first trip to Reno? Cinch. Right on.

Who's the cat that called the exact final score (except for a missed extra point) in his Play of the Decade for the 1980's (it covered by seven touchdowns)? Cinch. Can you dig it?

Who's the cat that got hit in the eye by a chip that shot out of the drop slot at the Monte Carlo poker room? Cinch. What are the odds?

Who's the cat that got caught traveling between Biloxi and Tunica in Birmingham, Alabama, the night it snowed 19 inches in Birmingham - the biggest snow in the city's history (and the only night I've ever been there)? Cinch. The odds are what?

Who's the cat that wishes Elvis still played Vegas? Cinch. Amen.

He's a complicated man, hard to understand….Cinch. Can you dig it?