So You Don't Live Near a Casino, But You Enjoy Poker…

by Jim Woods

There were many "home games" before the New Millennium, but the poker boom has caused the number of such games to increase exponentially. People who had never before dreamed of poker are now playing in tournaments and regular games one night a week. Whether you are thinking of joining them or are already in a home game or three, here's some food for thought.

The number one consideration, from my point of view as an attorney, is whether or not the game is legal. Laws vary from state to state in the U.S., but in mine and many others the game is legal as long as ALL of the money goes to the players. If a non-player is getting a fee for hosting, dealing, promoting, or arranging the game, you may be in trouble. And don't give me the old, "What are the odds of getting caught?" The last thing I want toward the end of a successful night is a visit from the not-so-friendly neighborhood sheriff, who will give me a summons, confiscate all of the money, and send me home as broke as the losers!

Next, think long and hard about whether you will be playing primarily for fun or for profit. Of course you want to have fun either way, but the stakes, players, and types of games may not suit both objectives equally. For example, sometimes I play in a Friday-afternoon, No-Limit Hold'em, single-table tournament with business contacts. Many of the players are bad. They will chase, raise, or go all-in with anything or nothing, so the game degenerates into a luck fest, but I don't care because the buy-in is only $10. I don't play for profit (the biggest win ever was under $100) - I play because it's good for my business and always good for a laugh (which most of us can use at the end of a long work week). Another example is the "dad's-night-out" game in my former neighborhood. The betting was maxed at a quarter, with a maximum of three raises per round, so the most a round cost me was a dollar. Moreover, it was a version of "pauper's poker." Each of us bought in for $20, and if we ran out of money we were still dealt cards, so we would play for free but without the ability to raise. The bottom line was no one could ever lose more than $20 in a night, and the most anyone ever won was a whopping $63.25 (woooohoooooooo!) We were all friends, and none of us wanted to take serious money from a friend. The purpose of the game was to unwind once a month, tease each other, have a beer or two, and talk about the next neighborhood golf tournament.

On the other hand, you may see the home game as another source of income. If so, keep these principles in mind:

1. Games with wild cards or too many cards increase the luck factor, so they are bad from a profit-seeking perspective. From time to time, my usually conservative home game degenerates (generally late in the evening and at the urging of one or more players who are losing) and someone deals "Lotsa Pasta." For those who haven't yet had the displeasure (or call it something else), this idiotic game is played like Omaha hi-low, but with each player receiving 6, 7, or even 10 cards, depending on how many participants there are. Generally, the first cry of "Lotsa Pasta" is my signal to head home. The readers who play a lot of Omaha know what a river game it is, but in Lotsa Pasta, quads and straight flushes are downright common. If a loser changes the game you have been playing, you can usually assume it's his effort to "get even or even worse," as my buddy Bruce White, Jr. says.

2. Don't play for profit with people with significantly less regard for the dollar than you have. That means people who are much wealthier, as well as people who typically gamble for much higher stakes. You won't be able to bet them out, but they may be able to bluff you out when they raise or re-raise the maximum. My home game went through a rough stretch when someone (we haven't yet been able to convict the guilty party) invited a guy who convinced a majority to raise the stakes significantly, then raised the new maximum as often as he could. Yes, sometimes his bluffs were called, but occasionally he had the goods and people were going home much more down than usual. He was an "empty-nester," with plenty of disposable income, and our $10 and $20 bets were chicken feed to him (rumor had it that he often bet $1,000 on a single football game). Finally, common sense prevailed, we returned to our former betting limits, and he thankfully lost interest and stopped playing.

3. Play in a secure location, and have everyone agree not to talk about the game too loosely. Nothing draws thieves like cash outside of a bank with no cop in sight. Some thieves are stupid, but most can do elementary arithmetic. In a $10-$20 game, each player will probably bring $200 to $1,000. A thief who sees eight cars knows that no matter who's winning or losing, there's between $2,000 and $9,000 in cash on a table inside, plus watches, rings, etc., and probably no security cameras. Think it can't happen? Consider all of the convenience store heists you've heard about, even though those stores DO have security cameras, and the usual policy is to keep no more than $50 in the register.

4. Don't be afraid to leave when you are ahead. If you initially decided to play for profit, take your profit and go home to enjoy it. We all know that no matter how good you are at poker, the luck element always exists. Whether you will admit it or not, generally you have gotten at least a little lucky on a profitable night, and luck tends to flow around a table. Turn a deaf ear to the losers who say you are cheap, scared, or playing "hit-and-run." They are just trying to cajole you into staying so that your luck may turn and they may recoup some of their losses.

5. A related point is having a set time to finish the game. The losers NEVER want the winners to depart with their cash, and if you listen to them they will keep you playing until luck, fatigue, or both pry the profit from your wallet. If you are starting a game, get clear agreement among the players about a drop-dead, walk-away ending time. If you are joining an established game, find out when it ends and make it clear that you will honor that and expect everyone else to do likewise. If the game you are joining has no set ending time, don't play unless you are comfortable packing up your winnings and leaving when YOU want to go home, not when the losers want to LET you leave!

6. Finally, know when to say "when." Everyone has bad nights, and they aren't the ones in which you continually get dealt bad cards. The worst nights are those in which you repeatedly finish second, so you lose the most on each hand. There are no silver medals in poker. Before you start playing, set a stop-loss and adhere to it religiously. Your family, banker, and accountant will appreciate it, and you'll be able to enjoy longer the great game of poker.

This article was published at an earlier date on PokerPages.com and is being rerun due to popular demand.

About the Author:
Jim Woods is a middle-aged attorney (but please don't hold that against him) that loves fishing and poker. He has an undergraduate degree... that comes in handy in poker, less so in poker. His one favorite poker fantasy? Using Cling Eastwood's famous line on Phil Hellmuth while having him dominated in a hand: "I know what you're thinking... But what you gotta as yourself is: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well... do ya, punk?