Quips and Quotes from Poker Players
By Vince Burgio

Over the last few years, I have heard poker players say a lot of bright, funny, insightful and sometimes things that are just plain dumb. Hopefully, I have left out the dumb things and am passing on some of the others.

Al Krux: "This is the life that we have chosen." (speaking about playing poker professionally)

Mike Caro: "I am a lucky player; a powerful winning force surrounds me."

Warren Karp: "Forget about a chip and a chair-- give me a hand and I'll stand."

"The dealer gave me A-B-C-D then put out P-O-O-P." (speaking about Omaha, Eight or better)

"For those of you who have gotten here without getting in an accident, you've met the skill level to play in today's limit hold-em tournament." (Warren's announcement before starting a tournament)

Robert Turner: "A person should gamble every day, because think of how bad it would be to walking around lucky and not know it."

Benny Binion: "The only bad luck for a good gambler is bad health. Any other setbacks are temporary aggravation."

Freddie Gasperian: "To master poker and make it profitable, you must first master patience and discipline as lack of either is a sure disaster regardless of all other talents, or lucky streaks."

Rich Korbin: "All I know is, if the cards ever break even.....I'm screwed."

Okalahoma Johnny Hale: "I never saw a poker players money that I did not like."

"I sure have enjoyed playing with most of you."

"Gosh, Its great that Carol is still working."

John Juanda: "What are you going to do with all that money?"(speaking to whomever has just won money in a tournament)

Jan Fisher: "Just pack - We'll do the rest!"

Jack McClelland: "Take my advice and do as you please."

"To be a poker champion you must have a strong bladder"

Scotty Nguyen: "You call.gonna be all over, baby." ( Scotty's comment as Kevin McBride is trying to decide whether to call him on the last hand of the 1998 WSOP.)

Syracuse Chris Tsiprailidis: "Playing good is overrated."

Frank Henderson: "Play like a champ. Win like a champ. Act like a champ."

Bonnie Damiano: "If it were easy everyone would do it."

Joe E. Lewis: "I've been on such a losing streak that if I had been around I would have taken General Custer and given points."

Max Shapiro: "They say Poker is a zero sum game. It must be , because every time I play my sum ends up zero."

Steve Badger: "Besides lovemaking and singing in the shower, there aren't many human activities where there is a greater difference between a person's self-delusional ability and their actual ability than in poker."

"Once you start thinking you have nothing left to learn, you have everything to learn."

Chuck Thompson: "It's easy to be a tough competitor and still be the kind of person with whom people love to compete with"

"If you always start with the worse hand, you never have a bad beat story to tell"

Al Morris: "I lost with the Wyoming Twins, Jackson Hole"

Vince Burgio: "I feel much closer to God today. I spent about five hours playing poker with a priest, Father Charles Glorioso and a Rabbi, Steve Kaufman."

"Be careful what you wish for you just might not get it."

"If you're a competitive person and you commit yourself to something you have no choice but to endure."

Sam Grizzle: "Where do they come from?"

David "Devilfish" Ulliet: "The two things you need to be successful in poker are first, find the muck and second, don't play your own money."

Chuck Humphrey: "Egotism is the anesthetic provided by nature to dull the pain of being a damn fool."

"Before you criticize someone walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you criticize him, you will be a mile away, and you will have his shoes."

Frank DiElsi: "Life is too long to play bad cards."

Mike Sexton: "One day a chump, the next day a champion . What a difference a day makes in tournament poker."

Tom McEvoy: "There is more to poker than life."

Men the Master: "Nice hand sir."

John Bonetti: "Fuggetaboutit."

Andy Glazer: "The single greatest key to wining is knowing thy enemy- yourself."

For What it's Worth